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I don’t expect many people to understand what I’m about to share. I have a loving and beautiful relationship with my husband, who is the best person I know. I’m grateful for our years together and each member of the family we have created. But we are ending our marriage, to protect my mental health.
I do invite you to consider what your response will be if someone comes out to you this week. How will you respond? How will you protect their safety? How will you listen out of love, not fear? Can you set aside judgment and listen with openheartedness, both to them and to whatever words God may give you?
“What if, instead of looking around to see what others are doing, we look up to the Savior, and join hands in gratitude across whatever gaps may exist between us? Can I allow others to do Church differently than I do, if I am rejoicing with them in the love, grace, and tender mercies of the Son of God, our Savior Jesus Christ? “
“A few weeks ago, Meghan showed me part of a text she received where a friend asked how I was coping with my wife being gay. The short answer is ‘good.’ A more complete answer, like most real life, is more complex.”
“I feel more free, more myself, and more whole spiritually and emotionally. I feel mostly free of the shame that crushed me, because when I am not hiding I am not in shame. I am able to help others in ways I could not do when I was hidden. I feel more integrity, more at ease with all parts of me coming together.”
Since Tender Leaves of Hope: Finding Belonging as LGBTQ Latter-day Saint Women became available, I’ve received multiple requests for the Vegan Butter Chicken recipe, which I talk about in the beginning of Chapter Four. Here’s the story and the link for the recipe.
Guest post from Colette Dalton! “I know how hard it is to be vulnerable and open up to others so that you can connect with them. It’s scary and it doesn’t always work out. But human beings are social creatures, and we need connection just like we need food, water, and shelter.”
In this excerpt from Meghan Decker’s upcoming book Tender Leaves of Hope: Finding Belonging as LGBTQ Latter-day Saint Women, Meghan discusses the deceptive voice of shame which keeps us in hiding and despair.
Dr. Lacey Bagley shares some of her personal story with insights about sparks of connection.
In this episode of At Last She Said It, Meghan talks about concepts that have helped her to build healthy relationships and respect others’ growth.
Meghan Decker joins us this week to share ways to support LGBTQ youth. She dives into some of the research and statistics but also shares her own life experiences and wisdom.
This is a fireside I spoke at with Becky and Scott Mackintosh. They had such a great message for family and friends of LGBTQ folks. I talked about creating safety and belonging spaces for our LGBTQ loved ones and ward members. It would be a good video to share with others who are struggling to understand how to support LGBTQ/LDS loved ones and friends.
In this podcast I return to talk with Ben Schilaty and Charlie Bird about creating safe places of belonging for LGBTQ family, friends, and ward members.
Four years ago, I wrote a biweekly column for a Latter-day-Saint-friendly online publication. After the section on same-sex relationships was taken out of BYU’s Honor Code, I wrote an article pointing out the advantage of this change to students and the school. Just before I submitted for publication, the Church Educational System issued a clarification which made clear that any type of same-sex romantic relationship was a violation of the Honor Code (potentially grounds for dismissal from the University). I left the article unpublished.
As the anniversary of these events comes around again, I decided to post the article I wrote as a recognition of what might have been and what may yet be.